8/4/14

Stranger in Moscow

I watched one of my favorite movies entitled "The Help" last night again.  In it, I recalled one of the main characters narrating that no one had every asked what it was like to be her.  I recalled a visit from a young man from the day before.  He was eager to get into the music business and explained to me that he thought it was alright for Joe Jackson to have treated Michael the way he did.  He made him billions of dollars, as he put it.

The statement in the movie, the statement that the young man made really made my heart ache.  I realized that most of the world still thinks that Michael Jackson lived in a castle and was glittery all of his life.  No one asked him what it was like to be him. But I did, at one time.

I'd like to start from the end and work myself back to that time, because in the end, the last years of his life,  I believe, were the hardest.  I know what it's like to be alone.  Not to be able to count on anyone and if you're like most people when you think of Michael Jackson, you just don't think of people, you think of crowds of people.  People you think love him, people that you might think he could count on.

That wasn't the case.  Many times I would think he was extremely busy and he would tell me he wasn't. There was no one he could trust or feel supported by, bar a few.  It was Elizabeth Taylor that made a huge difference in his life and that's why she will always remain in my heart as well.  She was there while the rest of the world was crucifying him.  She was there when I couldn't be.

There was a time when Michael told me he had no place to go.  We talked about him and the kids coming to live with me and my then husband.  I remember thinking, can that be true?  No place to go? But he didn't.  And if he was seriously considering coming to live with me, I knew it had to be bad.

When we talked about Neverland and how it was so expensive I told him he should sell it.  When I thought about that last night, I wish he would have.  Neverland wasn't Michael.  Neverland is a place he created for what he wanted to do for the world.  Yet the world rarely thinks about what we did to him.

You can never know what you do to another person by your actions, in-actions, or words.  In this day and age it seems it doesn't matter if you're in the public eye or not, some seem to think that spreading lies and using others is just part of life.  Entitlement, getting something someone else has or is perceived to have is treasured more than treasuring life itself.  It's hard to know a loneliness that pervades even in the midst of cheering crowds.  It's hard to know who really loves you, when you don't know if it's the star they love or the real person.  It's hard to know a normal life, when life has never been normal.  And it's hard to accept that people think you should lead a normal life, when you never had it.

When I asked him what it was like to be him it was back around the year 1995.  He was recording then and asked what I wanted to hear.  I told him I wanted to know how it felt to be so popular.  His answer was in the song posted below.

Our world is full of people who feel alone and lonely, yet we rarely reach out to make a difference.  We perceive they have the perfect life or something we don't.  We don't realize they are people too.  Feelings, emotions and thoughts that make up their world.  You can be the richest person in the world, but riches can never bring true happiness and fulfillment.  It's our connectivity to each other and love that are the only things that can do that.

Remember to love, to reach out.  Someone right next to you could be hurting and needing support.
Maybe we could all start to ask others how it really feels to be them too.  Then maybe we'd realize that we are all in this together.  Rarely different on the inside, only perceived as different from the outside.