Hoping to find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and yet not knowing where the rainbow ends or where it leads seems to be a common theme among many. Who among us can say what we need in our lives to make us happy or what it takes to be deemed successful?
Our definition of our lives is brought about by many things. Our past conditioning, our feelings about ourselves and where we THINK we are going. When we feel we are on an upswing in our lives, maybe on the fast track with our career, we might feel we are on the road to success. But what happens when something changes and we lose that opportunity or something changes in our personal lives, like sickness that changes the road we thought we had before us?
Living this life is like becoming an explorer. We have to explore ourselves to the deepest depths to find what we are truly made of. We have to explore our world and see how we fit into the master plan. Sometimes as we traverse our path we tend to think we consciously have control of where we are going. However, most of us know that's not really the case. We have other factors that lead to our destiny, mostly those that are unseen.
When I look at these things, the unseen ones, I think about a network in the universe. That network connects everything and everyone. What I feel, what I think and what is held in my subconscious mind and the mind of the soul is continually transmitting signals through that network. I am creating, just not fully realizing all that I am creating. When we allow our conscious mind to take a back seat and let the navigation of our soul take over in wonderment, here begins our true journey.
Suddenly our lenses of perception drop away. We begin to see our true reality and who we truly are. Watching as the symphonic orchestra of life plays through us and the entire universe begins to conspire to bring to manifest all that we have ever hoped and dreamed. The key is in letting this happen with out the fight of the conscious mind thinking it knows what is right.
We are all living proof as we take part in each other destinies, either good or bad, that this world we live in is truly connected. We need only look through different lenses of perception to realize it.
So many times in life we tend to forget those things that are most important to us. We always have something to do, something else that is more important. Bills, car payments, houses, cleaning, our jobs and families consume most of our time. We forget about who we truly are and even who we want to be.
If I asked most people if they could be and do anything they wanted to for the rest of their lives with money not being an object, nine out of ten would have a very hard time. We often think of "things" that will make us happy; a new car, a new boat, a house, the list goes on and on. At what point will we become conscious and realize there is always another "thing" to acquire and if we dare look to the past none of those other "things" ever made us truly happy to begin with.
What does make someone happy? If you asked yourself that question what would you say?
Most often it is our dreams and pursuit of them that makes us happy and fulfilled. It is the passion we have with our purpose that drives us and makes us content within our beings. Everything has purpose.
As we look to our man in the mirror try and discover your purpose. Most often you will find it in those things that bring you the most joy. It could be something as simple as singing, caring for children, art, dance, almost any "expression" of you. When you think you've found even a glimmer of it, practice it every day even if its just for a few minutes. Allow yourself the time to discover what is hidden in that thing that you like so much.
You see purposes aren't immediately known. They are cultivated over time. Like a process of birthing, you are sowing those seeds to prepare you now for your purpose. Be like that child. Ponder at your purpose. Wonder about it and let it unfold and reveal itself to you.
Even the carrot when it grows in the ground does not discover it's purpose until it is fully mature and ready for it's fulfillment. Allow yourself to be as patient as the carrot growing in the dirt or the new spring flower just emerging from the ground. Keep your dream in your heart and as you mature and look back on your life you'll realize that everything you have done has unknowingly led you to your purpose. Looking back you will realize and see the most beautiful tapestry of circumstances, events and people who have all in some way, shape or form have contributed to your purpose.
This is how the universe works. All of it conspires to fulfill your purpose. All of us unknowingly contribute to it, even though some events may seem bad at the time. This is why we can also look back and know that once again we are this huge symphony of magic. Each playing our tunes in divine unison, each knowing there really is not an us or a them, there is only a we.
May you keep your dream alive and strive towards it from this moment on.
As most of you know I have been a medium all my life. My grandmother and others have been regular contacts. Last week I posted some of Michael's comments about his kids, family and AEG. He remains concerned for the welfare of all his family members as is Elizabeth Taylor, who remains by his side.
Today this is what he had to say:
"I want to let you know that I love you all. As fans and friends I could not wish for anything better. However, the events of the past week have been tumultuous for my family. My concern for them is great and I ask that you respect their privacy during this ordeal.
There have been many things that have recently come to light for my family that they were not aware of. Some of it has been the events that had led to my death. Even though it is three years since my passing they are still in mourning. My heart remains with my family and I am very concerned for their well being.
Please refrain from spreading viscous rumors and lies about them. What is reported is not always what is true and my kids are suffering because of it. Please, please help them by keeping them in your prayers and helping them see the truth.
With gratitude and love,
Michael"
Elizabeth Taylor
"I want you to know that every one of you that decides to spread rumors will be accounted for. Everybody that does this should know what they are dealing with. Not everyone in Michael's life was especially nice to him and it should stand to reason that now that he has passed those same people are not very nice to his family either.
Believe me, the press knows only half the story and most of the time they get that screwed up! Don't believe what you hear. Know that things will be taken care of in due time and in the end everything will be fine.
Paris, Prince and Blanket are the only concerns I have right now and I will see to it personally that they are offered comfort during this tenuous ordeal.
Michael and I will not be leaving his family, especially during their time of need."
Recently there have been some events taking place in the Jackson family. Lawsuits can be very vicious. Currently there is still an ongoing lawsuit with AEG and the Jackson family. There is quite a bit going on and as with most things that happen in the family, Michael still remains concerned about those things that have transpired and that will transpire in the future.
His heart is still with his family very much and he watches over them. He has been distressed over some events of the past and continues to monitor what is happening even to this day. For me I only know because there is a sense of calm before the storm.
Some things he wishes to comment on, others he'd like to leave alone. This one is different. It involves the children and whenever his kids are involved he is always very convicted about his position.
This is his statement:
"This in no way shape or form involves my children. This is an adult matter and should be treated as such. Those who believe they should bring my children into this matter are mistaken. I will do everything in my power to stop this harassment of my family. STOP NOW!"
You know the ugliest side of humanity is this: Pitting people against one another and dividing those who once stood in unity is a favorite tactic among many, There has been so much injustice that has been served in this mess and it is very, very hurtful.
The Jackson family must stick together and stay strong at this juncture. I pray they remember why they are fighting and the reason this has come to this point and don't back down. Katherine Jackson, you are amazing. The strength you have shown and the person you are is a blessing to the world. Remember God gives no one those things that they can't handle. You must be very brave in confronting evil, and that's just what this is. Evil doing it's job. A family that prays together, stays together. Don't let them come between you and know that Michael is not only looking on, but trying to help.
You are all in my heart and prayers as well. Don't give up the fight.
If you are a fan or maybe even just a reader of this blog and would like to help. You can offer a prayer of support for the family and for truth to be known and reconciled. Specifically, you can ask for guidance for the family and protection for them and the children. Your gift would be most appreciated.
In past ages we have had many beliefs. One such belief was that the world was flat. Years later a famous discovery was made by a man named Christopher Columbus. He was chastised for believing that the world was not flat. Yet upon discovery and proof, years later it is now common belief that the world is indeed not flat, it is round.
In some of the same ways we are also in a point in history when many beliefs of the past will be shed. There are new discoveries on the horizon at both a global level and a personal level for all people. When we say we are one, one in union in spirit, we mean we are one family, one race and one world. It's like saying the world is round. Some people believe in the possibility of it, others shun at the idea completely. Some day soon, however, you will know this not just as a possibility but as an absolute truth.
Union of spirit exists in every one of us as many different levels. I am sure by now you have experienced something extraordinary in your life that has led you to believe that there is more to this world than the three dimensional aspects that you were taught at school. Perhaps your mother or father instilled in you a great reverence for our God or Allah. Again, here is something that is believed in by many, yet proven by none.
The point is that many of us believe in things we really have no basis to believe in, not trusting its validity because it has not been proven by the tests that mankind has currently available to them. But what if there existed something so extraordinary that no man on earth was ever able to scientifically prove it? And that the same thing was able to heal the world completely and infinitely without question? Would you want to know about it? Would you want to know it's side effects?
Love unconditionally can do that. You can't prove love, you can't taste it, you can't smell it, and for as long we know it has not been scientifically proven as of yet in human history. Yet for centuries humans have believed in it only because they themselves have had glimpses of feelings of it.
So I ask you today, where do these glimpses of feelings come from? Was it something taught to you by your elementary school teacher? Did someone have to make it a scientific discovery for you to believe in it? Why, then is love the most universal thing in the world? Every culture, every country, every nation and every race believes in love, yet no one has told us to or even pointed out that we should.
This is where we are going. The human race is evolving to a place of knowing without a doubt that there are instinctive knowings within them that contain centuries of information that is absolutely true. We will know without being told. Find new beliefs without being taught. Many things will change on the face of the planet with only one force leading its way - love. The one thing mankind has yet failed to prove, yet still somehow believes in.
The shift in consciousness is now underway. Many people are feeling its effects and are beginning to become conscious of themselves missing a key ingredient in their lives. Some may try to name it; peace, friendship, a partner, or just happiness. Some may simply just say it is love. Some already know it's love. We are all love and we should strive to be love and to be loving.
This day take the time to exemplify yourself as love. Be kind, strong in character and truthful to both yourself and the people around you. Show kindness and courtesy, braveness and honor and let no one tell you who you are but you.
These are the hallmarks of becoming oneself and aligning yourself with the divine.
Today we offer a prayer from Summit Lighthouse for those who wish to reach for their twin flames. Even if he or she resides on the other side of the veil, this will still allow you to connect within the heart and calls for the highest of intentions; not of a selfish love, but of service to humanity. The greatest love one can extend:
In the name of the Christ, I call to the blessed I AM presence of our twin flames,
for the sealing of our hearts as one for the victory of our mission to humanity.
I ignite the light of the holy spirit for the consumption of all negative karma
limiting the full expression of our divine identity and for the fulfillment of our divine plan.
In our hearts, we truly pray that all twin flames be united in both love and service. This is a very exciting time in human history and we are so blessed to be able to witness this marvelous transformation.
Sometimes we think about things that happen in our life and we tend to respond by taking action right away. It's the gut response, our automatic pilot that takes over and before we even think about what we are doing we respond and either say things we don't mean or do things maybe we never intended on doing.
These automatic responses are patterns within us. They are like the dirt road with the ruts so deeply ingrained in the sands and soil that we continue to compromise ourselves by taking the same road again and again.
This week try to observe these actions. Instead of responding to someone right away with words or taking action right away with either doing something for yourself or someone else pause for a moment. Maybe even say, you have to think about it or give me a minute.
During that time think about what your automatic response might have been. Then think about what it is that you think the BEST response would be for your highest self. What in that moment would be best for you to do or say for the best outcome on both sides.
You'll notice as you do this the differences in being conscious of your decisions and just reacting unconsciously and it will allow greater sight of those patterns we might want to change.
Sometimes we think in order to come into our true divinity we have to just sit and meditate a whole lot. That's not exactly true. When you think about it the human being is affected by more in the mind than just silence. Our physical bodies, our emotional bodies, and our spiritual bodies also hold onto substances or energies that must be released.
These energies can be like toxins and as much as you try to find peace in your mind they remain stored as a part of you. Coming into a fulfilled sense of union with yourself requires more than just meditation then. It requires a sincere desire and honest look at ourselves as well as physical movement to engage the stored energy patterns that are trapped in the body. Our inner yoga is meditation and contemplation. While our outer yoga should be something physical. Maybe for you it is yoga itself or maybe it is the expression of dance. What ever you choose to help you acquire your peace make sure you don't limit your beliefs on what it can do. Make your expression physically as if you yourself are a piece of art.
You are a divine piece of art, expressing yourself in the world as a source of energy from the true light and greatest poet, songstress and artist in the world - God.
As I promised I have made available the postings from The Man in the Mirror Project in e-book and published form. The link is at the right. When you get to the site it will automatically take you to the ordering page for the printed version. The FREE e-book version is available when you scroll down to RELATED EDITIONS.
If you haven't voted already, please take the time to do so here: http://nextgreatestspeaker.com/?aid=93
If you too are an author or want to be author that has something to say to the world, I encourage you to take a peek at what they have to offer for you as well. Every one of us has music to share with the world, and I hope you take the time to share yours too.
Recently I ran across this video with Kelley Rosano. It's a very nice explanation of the path to your twin flame and wanted to share it here with you. It underlines most everything we have said here.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Thank you Kelley for sharing and becoming who you were meant to be.
Our natural desire in life is to be one. The tendency to draw yourself into a group or into union with another human being is one of the greatest needs we have.
Throughout history this same tendency is present. Forming churches, societies, clubs, recreational activities, political parties, the list goes on and on. Simply put humans need to feel a sense of belonging. Have you ever noticed it is with other humans that we seek most often to be with?
A century old proverb says when the tree is ready the fruit will ripen. Our thought is then when the world is ready the union of human consciousness will occur.
This union is three fold. It entails a great deal of time and effort on your part. A inner perspective and cleansing of old values and systems within yourself before we can begin the next phase.
Listening to your gut, to the voice within is only one part of this process. The other is in observation. What is your nature? What do you gravitate towards?
Observation is different than condemnation. Observation says lets see what I can see. Condemnation says I don't like what I see and there fore must be bad. Remember, these things that we notice within ourselves, mostly these patterns, are those things that we ourselves have created or have been handed to us through society or family systems. In observation of our nature, we observe ourselves in our natural state. In observation of our patterns, we observe our tendencies on our reactions to our world.
Funnel these thoughts through, and when you notice something about yourself decide if it is a natural tendency or something that was created.
When we get back to nature, we get back to our true selves and it is there that the real process of integrating the human spirit with all of mankind can begin. We are indeed one.
This morning as I sat to write it began to rain heavily outside. Looking, I could see the streams of water seemingly pouring out of nowhere. It reminded me of a previous post about the rain and how nature always reminds us of how we should live our lives.
I wanted to write something about freedom and independence. Tomorrow is the 4th of July in the States and we use that day to celebrate our independence and freedom, although these days it seems more about the picnics and BBQs.
I can't write alone. I mean I could, but truth be told I feel like I'm just the "typer" of things here since most of the writing is a gift and comes from either Michael or my guides on the other side. So this morning I checked in with them and was distressed about their message, only because it hit home, yet once again with me.
It was the rain that perhaps made it set in for me. I was reminded of when Michael had passed. They say that twin flames sometimes lead parallel lives and when I heard about his passing I sat motionless and numb wondering what was going to happen to me. Truth be told, I was waiting to die. My life was thrown up in shambles. My husband had been leaving bruises on my son and I had filed for a divorce. My parents sided with him and abandon me. I had to put my dog asleep and the friends I thought I once had said they couldn't be there for me, came out and said good bye, or never returned phone calls or emails.
I was left alone wondering what it was that I had done. Could I be that bad or could people be that selfish that they would walk away in the moments that I needed them most and in most cases make it worse, waiting for me to fall? My divorce, may pain, became all about them and what they were going through. It was in one of those reflective moments that one of my guides interjected. He said the reason this had happened was because I was being given a gift. The gift was freedom and in order for my new self to emerge from the illusion of my past I had to let that old energy and those old patterns leave. I had graduated on a spiritual front, yet I still held tight to wondering why people I thought cared about me left. Michael, I thought, was even taken from me.
As the months passed and I began to look back Michael re- entered my life. Elizabeth Taylor had just passed and was eagerly trying to get my attention. She told Michael that he had to tell me why he was still here. Michael died a physical death and with him, I died a spiritual death. So as we came back into union and discussed why he was here he simply said it was to help me. I have to laugh, because when I think back to that time and others, he has always been a man of very few words, never really going into detail unless he's asked. So he is here helping me, to help you and as we approach this very momentous time in history, he would like to remind you of why we broke off and entered into independence so long ago. The independence we speak of is not only for us, but for all all countries and all people - we all need and deserve to be free.
St Germain is the ascended master that sponsors Michael and I. His ray of energy is the ray of freedom itself. On the fourth of July, 236(and I'll just note the numerology of this number is number 11 - the spiritual messenger....remember it is 2012) years ago, he was one of the men that inspired the signing of the Declaration of Independence. As we read the following words of Declaration itself, I have highlighted some areas and ask that you reflect not only on the state of your country, but on the state of yourself. You too deserve freedom should your life be in binds from any situation or person.
Going forward may we all see the value in these words and uphold these truths for not only the United States but for all countries and all people.
When in the course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.
That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers. He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries. He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people
Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.
— John Hancock
New Hampshire: Josiah Bartlett, William Whipple, Matthew Thornton
Massachusetts: John Hancock, Samuel Adams, John Adams, Robert Treat Paine, Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island: Stephen Hopkins, William Ellery
Connecticut: Roger Sherman, Samuel Huntington, William Williams, Oliver Wolcott
New York: William Floyd, Philip Livingston, Francis Lewis, Lewis Morris
New Jersey: Richard Stockton, John Witherspoon, Francis Hopkinson, John Hart, Abraham Clark
Pennsylvania: Robert Morris, Benjamin Rush, Benjamin Franklin, John Morton, George Clymer, James Smith, George Taylor, James Wilson, George Ross
Delaware: Caesar Rodney, George Read, Thomas McKean
Maryland: Samuel Chase, William Paca, Thomas Stone, Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Virginia: George Wythe, Richard Henry Lee, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Harrison, Thomas Nelson, Jr., Francis Lightfoot Lee, Carter Braxton
North Carolina: William Hooper, Joseph Hewes, John Penn
South Carolina: Edward Rutledge, Thomas Heyward, Jr., Thomas Lynch, Jr., Arthur Middleton
Georgia: Button Gwinnett, Lyman Hall, George Walton
Simply put, in government, in the world and individually it is necessary to sometimes deconstruct our lives and rebuild for the safety, well being and happiness of ourselves, our families, all people, and the planet itself. God Bless these courageous souls who have given so much for our freedom and thanks be to those who continue to fight for it.
"Abuse is a serious crime against humanity, and can have far-reaching and long-lasting consequences:
55% of North Americans are victims of sexual abuse. 1 in 5 male children, and 1 in 3 female children will be sexually assaulted before they reach adulthood - The National Clearinghouse on Family Violence.
There are 1.7 million reports of child abuse each year in the U.S.
There are 140,000 injuries to children from abuse each year.
There were 1,400 child abuse fatalities in 2002
Of the violent crimes in Canada, 27% are victims of family violence.
Of the reported sexual assaults, 61% are children (the percentage may be higher because many children don’t report the abuse)
In 1999, the McCreary Adolescent Health Survey II found that:
35% of girls and 16% of boys between grades 7 - 12 had been sexually and/or physically abused
Among girls surveyed, 17-year-olds experienced the highest rate of sexual abuse at 20%
In their 2001 report on Family Violence in Canada, The Canadian Centre for Justice Statistics found that children who are exposed to physical violence in their homes are:
more than twice as likely to be physically aggressive as those who have not had such exposure;
more likely to commit delinquent acts against property
more likely to display emotional disorders and hyperactivity
University of Victoria's Sexual Assault Centre posts the following childhood sexual abuse statistics:
1 in 3 females and 1 in 6 males in Canada experience some form of sexual abuse before the age of 18.
80% of all child abusers are the father, foster father, stepfather or another relative or close family friend of the victim.
Incestuous relationships last 7 years on average
75% of mothers are not aware of the incest in their family
60-80% of offenders in a study of imprisoned rapists had been molested as children
80% of prostitutes and juvenile delinquents, in another study, were sexually abused as children.
In their 2001 report on Family Violence in Canada**, The Canadian Centre for Justice Statistics found that:
69% of substantiated physical abuse involved inappropriate punishment
68% of substantiated sexual abuse involved touching and fondling
58% of substantiated emotional maltreatment involved exposure to family violence
48% of substantiated cases of neglect primarily involved failure to supervise the child properly, which lead to physical harm
Abusers are commonly known to the survivor
In their 2001 report on Family Violence in Canada, The Canadian Centre for Justice Statistics found that family members, including relatives, constituted the vast majority (93%) of alleged perpetrators.
A statistical study conducted in 2001 by the Canadian Centre for Justice Statistics found that:
among family assaults parents were the perpetrators in 56% of physical assaults against youths and 43% of sexual assaults against youth victims 12 to 17 years of age
siblings were responsible for approximately 25% of physical and 26% of sexual assaults in the family that were perpetrated against youth
extended family members committed 8% of physical, and 28% of sexual assaults against youth
Third National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect (NIS-3) US Department of Health and Human Services
Children in mother-only households are 4 times more likely to be fatally abused than children in father-only households.
Children in mother-only households are 40% more likely to be sexually abused than children in father-only households.
Females are 78% of the perpetrators of fatal child abuse, 81% of natural parents who seriously abuse their children, 72% of natural parents who moderately abuse their children, and 65% of natural parents who are inferred to have abused their children.
Natural mothers are the perpetrators of 93% of physical neglect, 86% of educational neglect, 78% of emotional neglect, 60% of physical abuse, and 55% of emotional abuse.
When the perpetrator is a non-natural parent, that males are the perpetrators of 90% of physical abuse, 97% of sexual abuse, 74% of emotional abuse, and 82% of educational neglect.
Children are 20 times more likely to be fatally abused, 22 times more likely to be seriously abused, 20 times more likely to be moderately abused, and 18 times more likely to be sexually abused in households earning less than $15,000 per year than in households earning more than $30,000 per year.
Boys are four times more likely to be fatally abused and 24% more likely to be seriously abused than girls.
Between 1986 and 1993, as the number of single-mother households increased dramatically, fatal child abuse increased 46% and serious child abuse increased four fold.
There are many possible effects stemming from abuse. When abuse occurs to a child, they are left with feelings that are difficult to understand and put into perspective. Children trust the adults in their lives to meet their needs and they believe that adults know what is good for them. When they are assaulted, they believe they deserved it, and therefore, they are bad people. They feel extreme shame and guilt AND responsible for the abuse. They feel helpless and fearful as they are not able to control or stop what is happening to them. In the case of sexual abuse, if their body responded to the stimulation, the good feelings produced from a bad experience may be confusing to a child. Therefore, they may believe that they wanted and liked the abuse.
Untreated persons of sexual, physical, or emotional abuse may struggle with:
Controlling behavior in their relationships & environment
An inability trust anyone, including God, which interferes with their ability to become saved
Low self-esteem that interferes with their ability to receive love messages from others and God
Inappropriate social behavior
Isolation & loneliness
Poor boundary identification
Unrealistic expectations of others
Perpetration of abuse unto the next generation
Anxiety and Panic attacks
Feelings of guilt, shame, and responsibility for what happened
Perfectionism
Fear & discomfort in new situations and/or around unfamiliar people
Feelings of being marked, different, unacceptable, abnormal, and dirty
A belief that they are stupid and incapable of achieving success
Sabotage their own efforts to succeed
A belief they are unacceptable to God and going to hell no matter what they do
An inability to make decisions or trust their own opinions; look to others to affirm them in their decisions or make their decisions for them
Authority
Ritualistic behavior, depression, eating disorders, obesity, and dizziness or numbness, feelings of impending doom
Suicidal ideation or behavior, emotional shutdown, blocked or repressed memory, splitting of personality, self-injury such as slashing of body
Drug & Alcohol abuse
An abusive partner
Learned passivity and avoidance of confrontation
A partner with a substance abuse problem
Unintended pregnancy
Promiscuity or Frigidity
Sexual dysfunction
Flashbacks
Preference for rough sex, bondage, and/or same sex partner
Chronic head, face, or pelvic pain, musculoskeletal complaints, gastrointestinal distress or symptoms, and asthma or other respiratory ailments
Poor or no parenting skills, leading to child abuse
Anger management difficulties and aggressive behavior
The effects of an abusive childhood may appear right away, may appear in adolescence, or may show up only in adulthood. Often survivors of abuse do not cope well. However, some children are able to compensate well and some even become overachievers. A few adult survivors of childhood abuse may be competent professionals and compensate well for the adverse effects of an abusive childhood. However, when an added stressor such as a physical illness, birth of a child, or death of a family member is introduced into their lives, even they are unable to cope. No one escapes child abuse unharmed. Eventually, the history of abuse catches up to everyone.
Treatment of abuse brings relief, peace, and healing. The survivors of abuse can live healthier and learn to cope with life’s challenges with dignity and success. They can break the generational cycle of abuse and experience the joy of healthy relationships."
