Humbling Experiences from the Afterlife

1 Corinthians 3 

3 However, brethren, I could not talk to you as to spiritual [men], but as to nonspiritual [men of the flesh, in whom the carnal nature predominates], as to mere infants [in the new life] in Christ [[a]unable to talk yet!]

2 I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not yet strong enough [to be ready for it]; but even yet you are not strong enough [to be ready for it],

3 For you are still [unspiritual, having the nature] of the flesh [under the control of ordinary impulses]. For as long as [there are] envying and jealousy and wrangling and factions among you, are you not unspiritual and of the flesh, behaving yourselves after a human standard and like mere (unchanged) men?

I heard this scripture this morning and had an aha moment.  I spent last evening in prayer for Bobbi Kristina Brown.  I was met with the fact that if she continues to live that she may not want the life that she will have to endure.  I wanted so much for her to heal and be well, I had forgotten the choice of the person.  The compassion we need to understand their walk is not a choice we have to make, it is theirs.

The scripture above hit me because I was met with a similar situation when I had heard about a friend that had gone missing.  Matthew, now on the other side, had committed suicide.  I knew he did and I immediately went out to "find him".  I was determined to make sure I found his body, when he himself said he wasn't ready.  He was in a great deal of emotional pain when he passed.  He said he wasn't ready to be found, because when he was, he would have to endure that pain all over again.

In both of these instances I had tried to put my will over the will of those that it most effected and I am humbled.  This, as the scripture above notes, is being under the control of ordinary impulses.  My impulse was to do what I thought was best.  Not what was best for the person involved.

They say that we will get hit with the same lessons again and again until we get it.  For me and my ego, these weren't the only two things I had tried to control.  My guides had told me years ago I needed to go back to work for a man who had forged my name on a document.  I resisted....profusely. Yet I knew that there must be good reason if they were telling me to do so.  I phoned the man.  He needed someone to work and I began the next week.

I found that his mother was dying of cancer.  His mother was apparently the one that had forged my name on the document that I had left the company for to begin with.  She wanted my forgiveness. She had held herself responsible for my leaving and wasn't able to forgive herself.  We spoke on the phone and settled things.  It was the next week that she passed and soon after that I left the company again.

Several years ago I wanted to buy a home.  It was perfect.  I prayed very hard for it.  I was a good person, I thought.  God would surely give me grace.  When I asked if I would get the home when a bidding war ensued, I was met with the blunt answer of "no".  I was unaccepting, and like a child went into a little temper tantrum in my mind, at least for a few moments.  Yet when the news came that my bid was not accepted, another home that was nicer, bigger and less money appeared.

The lesson in all of this is trust.  We have to trust that everything is happening in the right way for the right people, at the right time.  Although we may want what we do and believe we are correct in our thinking, sometimes there is another side of the coin.  Sometimes we have to let go of our ordinary impulses and step back to let nature take its course.  Following the clues the universe has laid before us that lead us to the best for others and not necessarily what we think is best for ourselves.