The Man in the Mirror Project - A Dogs Life

What sets your thoughts into motion?  An emotional trigger, a bizarre event, someone accusing you of something you didn't do, or even an emotional hangup that's been bothering you for years.  Sometimes when we begin thinking about a problem or event we hardly realize that we are creating our own struggles internally, wrapping energetic cords around our very souls, almost as if we are suffocating ourselves with emotional and mental anguish.

Ouch! When I was given this information this morning boy it hurt.  I had been reliving past hurts that reared their ugly head again.  How difficult it is to sometimes just let go.  It is in the thought that "I can't believe people can be so cruel" part that always starts my thoughts to reeling.  Sooner than later, it's just that one thought that begins it's own journey within my being.  That thought spurs another, then it is the feeling of extreme hurt that encompasses my being.  My heart shuts down and my shoulder round, closing off my heart center, protecting myself from further hurt.  I begin to withdrawl more, not wanting to be hurt again and so the cycle continues and I lead myself down a road that eventually goes no where.

It's hard to start again after an emotional trauma, a hurt that is perceived or caused by another.  Our natural tendency is to protect ourselves, and many times we do this without even realizing it.  Michael told a story many years ago about a dog named Black Girl that is similar and he also gave us a glimpse on how we might take ourselves out of the hurt:

When I was very young I remember that we had this crazy mutt of a dog named "Black Girl," a mix of wolf and retriever. Not only wasn't she much of a guard dog, she was such a scared and nervous thing that it is a wonder she did not pass out every time a truck rumbled by, or a thunderstorm swept through Indiana. My sister Janet and I gave that dog so much love, but we never really won back the sense of trust that had been stolen from her by her previous owner. We knew he used to beat her. We didn't know with what. But whatever it was, it was enough to suck the spirit right out of that dog.

A lot of kids today are hurt puppies who have weaned themselves off the need for love. They couldn't care less about their parents. Left to their own devices, they cherish their independence. They have moved on and have left their parents behind.

Then there are the far worse cases of children who harbour animosity and resentment toward their parents, so that any overture that their parents might undertake would be thrown forcefully back in their face.

Almost a decade ago, I founded a charity called Heal the World. The title was something I felt inside me. Little did I know, as Shmuley later pointed out, that those two words form the cornerstone of Old Testament prophecy. Do I really believe that we can heal this world, that is riddled with war and genocide, even today? And do I really think that we can heal our children, the same children who can enter their schools with guns and hatred and shoot down their classmates, like they did at Columbine? Or children who can beat a defenceless toddler to death, like the tragic story of Jamie Bulger? Of course I do, or I wouldn't be here tonight.

But it all begins with forgiveness, because to heal the world, we first have to heal ourselves. And to heal the kids, we first have to heal the child within, each and every one of us. As an adult, and as a parent, I realise that I cannot be a whole human being, nor a parent capable of unconditional love, until I put to rest the ghosts of my own childhood.

And that's what I'm asking all of us to do tonight. Live up to the fifth of the Ten Commandments. Honour your parents by not judging them. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

That is why I want to forgive my father and to stop judging him. I want to forgive my father, because I want a father, and this is the only one that I've got. I want the weight of my past lifted from my shoulders and I want to be free to step into a new relationship with my father, for the rest of my life, unhindered by the goblins of the past.

In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.

Letting ourselves be free to love and believe is perhaps the greatest gift we can give the world and ourselves.  Don't ever let the pain in your life become your life.