A Conversation with Michael . . .

My day started reflecting on moments of why and how things came to be the way they are. Michael's life seemed not to be taken as a human being by many people. It is something about human nature that makes us think that those who "seem" to have more than us or are "more popular" somehow are not human. Sometimes even wishing harm on those we perceive to have more than us. Those that seem "luckier".

I know that most people who will read this may already know that Michael was taken advantage by many people, but at a deeper level when you are not only taken advantage of but used outright, and then have jealousy issues in your own family, it makes it even more difficult. I remember that while Michael lived I always tried to put myself in his shoes. Always tried to see what it would "feel" like to be in the public eye and loved by so many people. He said I didn't understand. Shortly after he wrote the song Stranger in Moscow. Listening to the lyrics you can understand being famous isn't all it's cracked up to be. Why is it that when you try to take yourself higher, there are so many looking to bring you back down? Instead of being jealous, why can't we be inspired to be lifted to our greater heights?

This morning we talked about happiness. He asked what it was that would make me happy and I honestly couldn't say. It wasn't someone else, I did know that. I reflected more, and thought about finding your greatest love, the love from God inside of you, but I was still missing something. The happiness, the feeling that was missing from my life was peace. True inner peace. I remembered how I found it before. I had gone to my first yoga class. The instructor was very patient, bright eyed , and exhibited love from the moment I walked in. I shook his hand and literally got a "zing" of energy. He too, was a Michael, and from that first handshake he came to be known as "Michael zing" for the awesome influence he had. It was during those first few classes that I became hooked on yoga. I was hooked because it was the first time I had felt nurtured. Nurtured in a true sense.

Michael (MJ) and I talked about this today and it led back to his childhood again. If you don't feel nurtured you don't feel loved. So you are continually looking "outside " yourself for someone to "make you feel loved" instead of stopping and finding out what it is you're missing in the first place. When I told Michael I didn't feel like I had that, he said he never did either. He was on the road all the time. Although he loved his mom very much and she did the very best she could, the fact still remained that her absence and the absence of nurturing went missing in Michael's life. Add that to abusers and users, and you begin to shut yourself off. It's hard to feel connected anymore to many people and at that the conversation continued.

I had taken my dog for a walk in a nearby park, and was amazed at how completely magnificent the trees looked. I live in the Midwest United States, and here it's fall. The colors are gold, red and bright greens and flank the sky in shimmering color as the wind gently blows the leaves. We sat for a while just admiring, when Michael said that's what he liked to do most. Go out in nature because that's where he could "connect" with nature, connect with God and feel "nurtured". Nurtured comes from the word nature and I suppose I had never thought about it, but it made sense. We had talked about how to get people on the right path to healing themselves with the book and this was one of the answers: to find the nurturing you need through things that nurture your soul and nature; allowing you to once again connect to the source of all LOVE.

He went on to say that's exactly what he was saying in his poem "dancing the dream". So I've posted that here for you to read.

Feeling alone, feeling isolated, and unloved is quite common right now. Even in his video of Stranger in Moscow it's illustrated by the homeless man in the corner, the single woman in the coffee shop. It could be and is, any one, and all of us. However, if we learn to nurture ourselves and bring ourselves back into awaremess with the all, we'll learn to feel loved once again. I truly hope we do.




Dancing the Dream

Consciousness expresses itself through creation. This world we live in is the dance of the creator. Dancers come and go in the twinkling of an eye but the dance lives on. On many an occasion when I'm dancing, I've felt touched by something sacred. In those moments, I've felt my spirit soar and become one with everything that exists. I become the stars and the moon. I become the lover and the beloved. I become the victor and the vanquished. I become the master and the slave. I become the singer and the song. I become the knower and the known. I keep on dancing and then, it is the eternal dance of creation. The creator and creation merge into one wholeness of joy.

I keep on dancing . . . . . . . and dancing, until there is only . . . . . . the dance.

-Michael Jackson